Biosponge Squareshock
by GodOfWurstwasser
Summary: I am surprised no one did that one before. Yeah, this is a Bioshock/Spongebob crossover and I WILL have my monkeys continue it, it came to my mind while I was spliced out on some serious Caffeine plasmids. Please read and review.
1. The dreamtime of Mr Bubbles

AN: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING OF THESE FRANCHISES, EXCEPT THE LITTLE SISTERS, THEY ARE MINE BECAUSE I HAD THE GOOD ENDING ON BIOSHOCK AND IN MY VERSION JACK WAS A MORMON AND THEY ALL MARRIED HIM!

Who lived in a city deep under the sea?  
ANDREW RYAN  
Libertarian, capitalist madman is he?  
ANDREW RYAN  
Whose pheromones made all the splicers obey?  
ANDREW RYAN  
Well, come down to rapture, where you will be made!  
ANDREW RYAN  
Ready?  
ANDREW RYAN  
ANDREW RYAN  
ANDREW RYAN  
ANDREEEEEEW RYAN!

Yahahahargh!

* * *

"There is a simple question: If a man chooses, and a slave obeys, what is a man who chooses to obey?" These words were written in big, red letters across the wall. Probably written in blood, who were there to judge it? "Life" in rapture was nowhere to be found nowadays. It was the year 2000 by now, and after some crazy guy with too descent ideals fled with most of the little sisters, the lack of new Adam killed off the last inhabitants of Rapture, who could no longer survive without their stem-cell-cancer-tonic. The only "life" left there were Big Daddies, while no one could figure out why they survived. They were the most spliced up beings there, and yet, for some odd reasons they were able to survive without regular infusions of Adam. While "survive" did not mean "live" - with the little sisters gone, the few of them that had not been killed by splicers, roamed the streets, doing the maintenance duties they were conditioned to do, without any satisfaction, without any joy. They had become robots, keeping a place intact that had long died.

* * *

"I have never been jellyfishing here", said Spongebob Squarepants in his light hearted voice, dancing happily over the ground beyond the sea. He was as annoying as ever, as he heard a deep, moaning sound, much like a whale. "What was that?", he uttered, deforming his own body in a comical manner, "It must be a super-special kind of jellyfish that will teach me more about friendship and happiness!" He jumped frolicking and humming towards the noise, as he suddenly felt a bump against his head and he faded into unconsciousness.

As he woke up, there was an extreme lack of water, considering him being an amphibious creature. But for some reason, he was still alive. He didn't even notice that he was lacking water. While there was never much on his mind, at first he didn't even think that he was somewhere dry. His sight was blurred, and it was extremely dark. As he tried to stand up, he heard that strange noise again, only that this time it was much, MUCH louder than before. It was so intense, it somewhat overwhelmed his naive mind. Then he saw what was making this noises. Some kind of colossus, with bright green eyes in front of him, at least five times his size. The moment he saw him, was also the moment he realized he was in an atmosphere of AIR. He gasped for water, feeling his demise because of him drying out imminent, but then – nothing. "Hmm, it seems for some reason I can survive in here... I wonder why that is..." BWWWOOOOAAAAHHHH – the creature in front of him made the noise again. He jumped up, ready to vanish behind an obstacle to hide in a comical fashion, but instead, he froze there, turned blue and stretched his body out of proportions to show how fucking scared he was. He investigated the creature while he was doing this.

It seemed like some giant guy in a diving suit, with a huge drill as a hand, and dozens of green eyes. His moaning cries seemed desperate, tragic, yet determined and strong. Spongebob calmed down, and his rectangular body returned to his normal state again. For some reason, after the first shock, the creature scared him no more, but he felt pity for it. He took one step towards the creature...

...He stepped right on a skull, falling over it – he then realised that he was so concentrated on the creature that he had not taken a look around. As he fell, suddenly the creature leapt forward, catching him with it's arm, and moaning again with it's whale-like voice. Spongebob wanted to thank the creature in some way, but then again, he was too shocked because he just realised what everything around him looked like...

He screamed, his eyeballs popped out of him and he suddenly exploded into an incomprehensible number of mini-Spongebobs, all screaming and running aimlessly around, until they all gathered to form the yellow sponge yet again. He was breathing heavily, altering his body size by at least ten times during this process. The creature in front of him moaned again, but this time, he didn't hear it very well. There was something else on his mind. Maybe it was the sight of roughly a hundred rotten corpses, or maybe it was the fact that they were piled up and mutilated, or maybe it was because they were odd creatures on two legs he had never seen, or maybe it was just because that when they were not already rotten down to the bones, their skin and flesh was deformed and the stench of death was overwhelming. Most likely it was because of all of this, but Spongebob collapsed and blacked out yet again.

* * *

There is not much to say about a Big Daddy. There is not much to a life of a Big Daddy. When you become one, your life is programmed. You have to work for Rapture, you have to protect little sisters. The latter gives you joy, so pure that you would give your life for it. The first you have an urge to do, that haunts you if you don't do it. Your once human body is a diving suit. Literally – your organs are in the diving suit, your skin is part of the diving suit, and everything is altered, spliced with so much Adam, almost no original cell remains in your body.

When the little sisters were still around, life was at least full of enjoyment. The anger and the pain when they were attacked, a rush! Pure excitement. The joy when they were happy, harvesting their prey, it filled your heart, or what ever had replaced it, with warmth. The sadness when they were leaving you again: "Dreamtime, Mr. Bubbles." Dreamtime, indeed.

For a Big Daddy there is no possibility of dreamtime, they are not supposed to feel anything but the feelings for their little sisters. But this one in particular had had dreamtime. It was while he was repairing a leak, outside of an access tunnel to the Hephaestos, which was still running, even after all these years. There something happened, which had not happened in over thirty years. He heard a voice. Not the moaning of big daddies – which only existed to communicate because of rational problems "leak here" - "damage there", or sometimes to desperately cry out for a little sister. But this, this was a voice. "I have never been jellyfishing here" - a sentence that did not make any sense to the Big Daddy, but it was a voice like a human voice. Somehow, after all these years, it triggered something inside the creature. Somehow it triggered something he had long lost – emotions. Feelings, urges, determination! He turned away from the small leak that was almost fixed anyway. The "head" of the Big Daddy was suddenly filled with images. Old images, images that were not now, not real. He did not understand the concept of dreaming at all, as he perceived the world on a level where there was no conscience that could have dreamed anything. But, this was a dream. Images of long forgotten times, of... them. The Little Sisters, their image was back again. He was running now, no he was storming towards that voice.

Not used to dreaming he was pretty confused, as he was storming towards the little yellow thing. So he just happened to forget how he could stop, dealing a normally fatal blow to the poor fellow. As he realised this, his mind yet again swept over with emotions: Fear! Panic! Did he kill it? It was not a question that he thought, it was a feeling that he had. He had to protect this thing. He had to! He had wished for something like this for ages, and now it seemed to be dead, lying in front of him. He had to protect it, he had to help it, he had to heal it. He took the little sponge-man on his arm and ran back to an entrance into rapture...

If there was a way to protect him, he was going to find it. Even if the little ting didn't want to be protected. He had found something that made his mind dream and his heart feel. He would never let it leave him ever again...


	2. Who is Andrew Ryan?

I am Eugene Krabs and I am here to ask you a question:  
Is a man not entitled to the money of his own resteraunt?

No, says the Plankton in the bucket. It belongs to the microorganisms.  
No, says the squid in the statue. It belongs to him.  
No, says the sponge in the pineapple. It belongs to everyone.

I rejected those answers. Instead, I chose something  
different. I chose the impossible. I chose...

_**The Krusty Krab**_.

* * *

In his clumsy arm, the fragile anthropomorphic sponge began to breath heavily. He seemed to dry out, in front of his very eyes. The one, the only thing left for him, dying! He moaned loudly in his anguish – what could he do to prevent this? What could he do? He was conditioned to protect this thing, to fight for it, to kill for it, but – there was no one to be fought. There was no one to kill, the only thing there was, was someone dying. Dying in his arm. He moaned louder, in panic, screaming – yes, this was something he hadn't experienced in a long time. He screamed, he screamed because of his pain. This very pain would drive others into insanity, but for this ex-human in the diving suit, it destroyed the lethargic routine, the everyday life of nothingness. This yellow sponge was dying, and he had to do something. He had never felt that good for decades, which was simply because he had never felt ANYTHING for decades by now.

With the pain, with the emotion, something else was liberated in his mind: Memories. Memories of... Humans. People that crowded this place, once, very long ago. And memories of something they used when they needed help. Some substance...

Adam...

Yeah, Adam, there was this stuff called Adam. And it helped people with all kind of problems – including imminent death. And his little ones, they had something to do with it, they... They needed it! Of course, he remembered now! The little sisters, they needed Adam to survive. It helped people! It could help this little thing as well! But, where could he find some? His moans became desperate, as the little sponge in the palm of his hand began to change and his arm suddenly fell off. It crushed into a sandy mess on the floor...

DESPERATION! AGGRESSION! MAYHEM! DESTRUCTION! His instincts broke through. He wasn't able to think any more, the short amount of time that he could do so had ended. Now, he had something dying he wanted to protect, and the only thing he could do was attack everything, to protect. Of course there was nothing threatening the sponge except air, but that didn't matter. He charged into a pile of rotten corpses, crushing a body which emitted a gooey slime consisting of thickened, mutated blood and rotten flesh. He screamed like a berserker, thrusting his drill into the pile of bodies over and over again, splattering the rotten guts of decades all over the place. While doing so he dropped the sponge...

It shattered...

It was gone...

He stopped moving. Everything he had accomplished so far was gone. It was now nothing but pieces of shattered sponge-substance... He didn't even cry in agony, he just stood there. The sudden impulse, the determination to do something was gone as quickly as it emerged...

The thick blood mixed with the sponge... It was a miracle that there was still blood, after almost half a century. But it seemed that after death, Adam somehow reduced the rate of decay. It wasn't the humidity of the thick blood, it was Adam, spliced into the very DNA of the sponge.

Spongebob Squarepants was a splicer now. People who knew him also knew how fast he could regenerate from almost everything. With his enhanced, unstable DNA, he regenerated in mere seconds, and during this, he somehow gained the ability to breathe air and stay in dry places. Well – what are the chances of something like that? One thing was for sure: The Big Daddy didn't coplain. As the creature regenerated in front of his eyes, he started to moan again.

* * *

As Spongebob regained consciousness once again, he didn't open his eyes. He couldn't. It was too much to bare for him. He wasn't used to this amount of death and decay. He knew things like the Flying Dutchman, but – these strange creatures, this aura of sadism and insanity...

BWWWOOOOAAAAHHHH!! The moaning again. A tear ran down his square cheek - "No more, please... I, I can't do this!"

BWWWOOOOAAAAHHHH!! The moaning started to sound sad and caring. He started crying - "No... Why.. Why is this happening? What is this? Why me?"

BWWWOOOOAAAAHHHH!

This time he opened his eyes again... The giant creature was standing in front of him, reaching out it's hand, to help him up. He stood up, ignoring the help the creature offered. He took a look around. "What... is this place?", he was still crying, while he said this. "What happened here?"

He was in a big hall, as he looked to the ceiling, he saw that it was made out of glass – much like he knew it from Sandy's dome. "Maybe this place was inhabited by squirrels once, and then these... creatures came and destroyed it?". He looked around, there were lights, electrical lights, and... there was a giant window... He carefully stepped towards it. As he approached it, he saw the whole city...

Rapture, a place to behold! Even after decades of decay! Glimmering lights, giant buildings, massive tubes. He stood there and gazed upon the bizarre beauty of this dead monument. Who built this? He understood that all of this was built by beings that breathed air – but it was nothing like Sandy's place. So she, or the monkeys that hired her were unlikely to be behind this. Finally he saw a giant sign...

"no Kings, no Gods, only Man"

And for just a second, there was a picture in his mind, with unknown origin, a face of a man... He had never seen him, but he seemed familiar... And a voice he never heard, but that also seemed so familiar. "I am Andrew Ryan..." The shock of the hallucination was so intense, he fell on his back in a most comical manner, while his face remained sucked on the window he had pressed it against.

"Andrew Ryan... Who are you?", Spongebob asked himself.


	3. Leaving the dead behind

AN: I just realised that Bikini Bottom and Rapture are nowhere near each other so IF YOU ARE INTO REALISM, STOP READING THIS SPONGEBOB/BIOSHOCK CROSSOVER IMMEDIATELY!

"A squid chooses, a sponge obeys!"

- Squidward Tentacles

* * *

As he was lying there he stared at the ceiling. "Who... is this Andrew Ryan?" The reason he was so concerned with this question was, that it kept him from asking himself the questions he wanted to avoid: "What is all this death and destruction about? What is this strange creature I met? Why can I breathe air? How come I have memories of someone I never met before?"

"Who is Andrew Ryan?" this time he asked the question, as if someone was there to answer it. But wait – there actually was someone to answer it – at least if this creature were able to answer any questions at all. Determined to find a solution to this riddle, he stood up, turning towards the calm colossus. "Well, we haven't really talked so far...", the yellow box-o'-holes said, "my name is Spongebob Squarepants, and you are?" BWWOOOOOAAAAHHH "Hmm, how do you spell this?", he asked, pulling a fully functioning pen and notepad out of his pants. But he didn't get an answer, which was really frustrating, because talking to this strange ...thing... was the only thing right now that kept him from taking a look around and probably discover more of these weird corpses. "Well... OK, so, I have a question for you..." While the living diving-suit didn't have facial features, Spongebob could see that the creature at least understood SOME of the things he said, and was pretty confused.

"Who is Andrew Ryan? Can you maybe show me where he is?"

* * *

His yellow "Little Sister" had been doing some strange stuff. First it was glued to the window, then it fell again, then it said something he could not comprehend, then it stood up, and again said some words. He had problems to understand it's talking, and as the man-shaped sponge talked to him directly, his confusion reached a new level.

He liked it. Being confused was a thrill, very much like the outburst of emotion he had when attacking the corpses. "...Sponge...pants..." Wait, no, it was something different... "Spongebob Squarepants!" Yes! That was it! It had to be it's name. As he realized he actually understood what the little fellow said, he cried a moan of joy!

Then, the little Sponge did something that made him even MORE irritated. Out of nowhere it suddenly took a pen and a notebook out of it's pants. This was impossible, considering the laws of physics. Well – actually he didn't know anything like "the laws of physics" but somehow he had a strong enough grasp at reality, that he realized something like that is impossible. Come to think of it – the actions of the sponge seemed very improbable to begin with, but he didn't realize that until now. Before now, his mind wasn't developed to realize ANYTHING but his own instincts.

The Sponge really was a breath of fresh air for him. It talked again, again, he barely understood what it said, it didn't seem that important. But as he didn't answer, his squarish buddy seemed uncomfortable. He concentrated, so that he would understand it... "...have a question..." Wait... Question? What did that mean... a second passed as this information erupted into his mind. Of course – a question, the Little Sisters had asked them often. He never bothered to answer, and they didn't seem to care too much.

"Who is Andrew Ryan? Can you maybe show me where he is?"

He understood the sentence completely. Andrew Ryan, a distant memory, he had heard this name before... Andrew Ryan. He looked at the creature he was protecting. Andrew Ryan, he was nothing like it, not yellow, and definitely not box-shaped with holes.

He looked at the pile of dead bodies. Yeah, Andrew Ryan was one of them. Not exactly of THEM, he was someone... special. The Big Daddy moaned again, the experience of – well – experiencing things was just.. awesome. Like an orgasm of thought he enjoyed every last bit of consciousness that inflated his mind. And in his very mind, there was a picture of a man. Again, it was a very clear picture, but the person was not here to be seen. This whole remembering-thing was something very new to the diving-suit-creature. Something new - and something great. And he remembered where to find this person, or at least, he remembered a place where it SHOULD be.

* * *

The creature shaped as a diving suit seemed to be contemplating something. It looked around and moaned loudly. For a few seconds, it seemed out of it's mind – just as if it was not perceiving reality any more, but some dream. Spongebob was very nervous because of this. While this creature was obviously not hostile towards him, he didn't know if he could trust it. And as long as he didn't have the creature to focus his thoughts on finding this "Andrew Ryan" he had a vision of, he had to face reality. And reality was still too much to bare for him. "Er.. Hello there?", he asked with a shy voice, as he took a step forward. The creature suddenly faced him, moaning even louder.

BWWOOOOAAAAAHHHH!! It waved it's drill-arm towards a big, metal door at the other side of the room. BWWOOOAAAAAAHH! Even if it was not possible for the giant to speak, Spongebob understood.

Spongebob was scared as shit, but as long as he managed to focus on his goal, he could keep his sanity with him. The Big Daddy was enjoying his life again, somehow it felt even better than the old days.

They went off together, leaving the big pile of dead behind.


End file.
